Easter Pictures

I know, I've terrible about keeping you updated lately.
Here are some pictures from Easter. :o)

Bell (looking very unimpressed)

Bean (slightly more impressed)

Bell and Bean

Bell

Bean

Christ is Risen
He is Risen Indeed - Alleluia

Lions

The lions made a cage for themselves.

I was a big proponent of this game. I prefer my animals to be caged. :)

playtime

I know I'm behind on blogging. I've been busy. :)

Here's what's been going on.
Bean is Bell's baby. (almost all the time)
She doesn't seem to mind... yet.

And then there's Gio and Millie. I have no idea where those names came from. Bell is Millie and Bean is Gio.

gorgeous garage

As we pull into the garage:

Bell - Wow! This place is Gorgeous!

Me - (laughing) the garage?

Bell - Yeah, this place is GORGEOUS!
Bean - How gorgeous is it, Bell?
Bell - REALLY gorgeous.

yep....
the garage

the question is, how gorgeous is your garage?

"Miss Independent"

According to Erik Erikson (the developmental psychologist), my girls are in the developmental stage of "autonomy vs shame and doubt". This stage is an explanation of their constant desire to "do it MYSELF!". They are building confidence, perseverance, and just plain strong will. 

It's clear after spending a short about of time with Bean and Bell that Mr. Erikson didn't just make this stuff up.

And yet... is this really a stage that ends at age 4?

I'm pretty sure that for most of my life I've spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to convince God that Kelly Clarkson's hit, "Miss Independent" should be my theme song.  God, most likely rolls his eyes at me and imagines a more appropriate song like, "Lean on Me" or "Can't Breathe without You". 

 

He's tried to correct my obsession with independence many times:

I knew all about babies and knew I could handle being a mom... so He gave me two. Ha! Now try to do it all by yourself, Miss Independent!

After Darin's death, I once again needed help. The support poured in and I was/am humbled by the caring friends, family, and body of Christ. Again, wouldn't ever make it on my own.

time passes

I start to feel like I'm doing well. I can do this "only parent" thing if I have to, I'm figuring it out. And on good days, I feel pretty darn proud of myself. So proud, I start singing my Kelly Clarkson theme song and forget, yet again, I am capable of nothing without Him. So, boom, I'm knocked out for two days feeling terribly sick and I can't take care of myself, let alone the girls. I have to rely on family. I have to recognize my own weakness, my own limits, my humanity. He teaches me, once again, to cling to Him and be grateful for those He has placed in my life to pick me up when I fall down.

And right now, I get it. I'm grateful for the lesson. But, realistically, He's going to to need to remind me again soon. 

 

Bean going potty this morning (by herself) while Bell listens to the story.

 

 

Eat your Os!

Just a few quotes from the past few days:

Bean finishes eating and leaves the kitchen.
I stay w/ Bell while she finishes up.
Bean pops her head back into the kitchen and says, "hi! bye again!"
She walks away and Bell looks at me very seriously and says, "It was so good to see Bean."

Aunt Jill reading "Knuffle Bunny Free"

Bean's story: One day, not so long time ago, I had a big jumpy girl jumping on my bed. She said, "who you talking to?" She came downstairs and wake her daddy and her momma and her brothers and sisters and her grandma. They were all laughing. The End.

Grandma and Bean

How do you know Jesus loves you?
He loves my carrots on my nose. -Bell
He makes me. - Bean
He makes me. -Bell
He loves your cup. -Bell
No! He doesn't love my cup! - Bean

2 years ago - Bean (l) and Bell (r)

me- Bean. You need to finish your Os.
She screams and yells and whines.
me - (very seriously) Stop. Eat your Os.
AHHHH!!!! more tantrum
me- You can choose to cry and whine, but it WILL NOT change my mind.
(impish grin) yes it will change your mind.
No Bean. If you want to get down, you must finish your Os.
(again, smiling) no i must not, mommy.... (then she starts whispering in a bunch of gibberish smiling the whole time)
me- (trying not to laugh) "What are you talking about?"
I talk about spankin your bottom. (at this point she actually cackles at her own quick wit)
(long pause) -
me- (very seriously) Bean...eat your Os right... now.
Bean - um, I think I have to go potty.

(yeah sure you do)

too much love

"When we want to be something other than the thing God wants us to be, we must be wanting what, in fact, will not make us happy. Those Divine demands which sound to our natural ears most like those of a despot and least like those of a lover, in fact marshall us where we should want to go if we knew what we wanted. He demands our worship, our obedience, our prostration. Do we suppose that they can do Him any good, or fear like the chorus in Milton, that human irreverence can bring about 'His glory's diminution'? A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word 'darkness' on the wall of his cell....
We are bidden to 'put on Christ,' to become like God. That is, whether we like it or not, God intends to give us what we need, not what we now think we want. Once more, we are embarrassed by the intolerable compliment, by too much love, not too little."
-CS Lewis
Problem of Pain
Chapter 3

Bell (blue) and Bean (red) in their "car".

sick of sick

Been a bit slow posting. We are all on anti-biotics. 

This is how we feel:

Bean

Bell

Some of us have it worse than others. :) Hopefully we'll all be back to normal very soon.

story

I began to record Bell's "story" after she was at least 3-4 minutes in; and yet it just keeps going...

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. John 14:27

Less Like Scars

a beautiful song by a talented singer/songwriter

Less Like Scars
-Sara Groves

It's been a hard year • But I'm climbing out of the rubble • These lessons are hard • Healing changes are subtle • But every day it's... •
Less like tearing more like building • Less like captive more like willing • Less like breakdown more like surrender • Less like haunting more like remember •
And I feel you here • And you're picking up the pieces • Forever faithful •
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation • But you are able • And in your hands the pain and hurt • look less like scars and more like character •
• Less like a prison a prison more like my room • Less like a casket more like a womb • Less like dying more like transcending • Less like fear, less like an ending •
• And I feel you here • And you're picking up the pieces • Forever faithful • It seemed out of my hands a bad situation • But you are able • And in your hands the pain and hurt • look less like scars •
• Just a little while ago • I couldn't feel the power or the hope • I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing • Just a little while back • I was desperate, broken, laid out • Hoping you would come •
• And I need you • And I want you here • And I feel you... • • And I feel you here • And you're picking up the pieces • Forever faithful • It seemed out of my hands a bad situation • But you are able • And in your hands the pain and hurt • look less like scars • And in your hands the pain and hurt • look less like scars • And in your hands the pain and hurt • look less like scars • And more like character